Crush

       There was an unfinished church at the confluence of a T-road named after a saint. We went down there every Saturday & Sunday afternoon. I was 7 or 8. Hangout on the lawn outside as we waited for the Sunday school ladies, playing some game of pebbles. Twas a buzz, but only the little girls took part.

      We sat on the first pews and the boys sat right behind us. And he was always there. Never said a word to me, but I felt his stares and his smile whenever our eyes accidentally met. He served as an altar boy, I danced with the girls.

       After church, we left without a word. Strangers who had grown too accustomed to each other. We often met on the road as I strolled along, him riding his bike in my direction. All the while; I'd smile, he'd give me that quiet look, and then we'd be gone.

       Years later, we were in high school. I was walking home and there he was again, the laid back boy with big beautiful eyes and a radiant smile, on his bike. But this day he said hey as we passed, I replied. It was the start of a friendship.

     Pizzas and cocktails in campus; he occasionally spotted me in town and took the liberty to drive me home amid chit-chats on his new exploits and cooking accidents. He said I had beautiful eyes.

       Met him on the street with an adorable kid, said twas his. But then again, he was just being his old charming self. We had coffee. Discussed big contracts and winning tenders, doing business with the right people and how he was happy for me to be finishing school. Said I had the cutest lips ever.

       Went out one night, to the chicken place for a quick snack, and there he was with the prettiest girl I'd met in a long while. Exchanged pleasantries on my way out …but right there I felt my heart sink deeper in its cavity. Turns out she was his baby siz.

       Tonight was his birthday, sent my wish for a grand new year on whatsapp. He said he'd really love to see me at his party. Well, I ain't no party girl but you bet I'mma rock this paaarty.

New town, new things, acclimatizing

It's a quarter past 11 and am feeling quite accomplished to be walking out of my door this "early". Waking up is always a struggle especially when there's not much to be done that capture's my imagination.

Well, let me fill you in. We just moved into this new small town. Not like we from the city, but twas a big small town. My mornings are slow, and my days are slower. The day comes to life in the evenings when everyone's back home from work. But me, am just here all day. Today was my first day of life, tired of staying indoors and loneliness beginning to creep in. I had come to a resolution to step out, know my hood and maybe make a friend along the way. I decide to walk to town instead of picking a mat. My feet would do with some flexing.

It’s an interesting little town which I've come to view as a juncture of rural and urban ways of life. It may be small but it houses all major banks KCB, Equity.. but scaled down to fit into this town. There are movie shops and boutiques with some really cute clothes and shoes. For retail, it lacks the renown retail giants like Nakumatt and Uchumi, but boosts its own local brand-not big and lavish though, and not too many to choose from, but something we can do with. The architecture reflects a different time of yester years whose locals have not really invested in much to upgrade. Most commercial buildings are bungalows or with a single storey not higher than that.

The infrastructure is okay..tarmac roads leading into and out of town and murram roads into the interior. There is tapped water and electricity - not so typical of a rural setup. Housing is fairly priced the standards are good too with keen attention to security and space. It does make a good bet for investors who seek to avoid inflated land prices in bigger towns or near cities. Being the county seat for this county's government, my small town is well placed for lavish growth as companies and government agencies set up shop here for devolved operations- that’s what got us here in the first place.

Taking my time to know my way around, I make a conscious decision to avoid the streets I know - not really streets, coz they don’t have names. I do some window shopping for shoes, the price are like 300/- cheaper than in Nairobi and they said we could negotiate. How cool is that! The fashion sense here is across the spectrum. Young people in their city dress code, vest tops and pencil jeans, jeggings and brightly colored tops, short dresses n skirts I reckon these are university students that are home visiting. These could otherwise be frowned upon in shaggz, but not here.

The beauty of my small town is in its expansive green gardens. The bananas and sugarcane, maize, beans and rice paddies, it’s a view one never really grows weary of; Lots of trees and fresh clean air with the smell of the countryside. There's lots of fresh produce from traditional green leafy veggies, fruits, matoke, milk...the entire spectrum. I can’t even remember the last time we had bread for breakfast we going healthy_ eggs and nduma/ sweet potatoes.

I'm close to home when I bump into one of my Indian neighbors; she's a sweet girl with a pretty face, warm heart and the most adorable 1yr old baby girl. She's been learning Swahili and insists on having conversations in her new language. Sometimes I have to listen in really hard to get it right but I must admit she's put in a full-court press and she sounded right at home today. My other neighbors are the cutest and smartest 7 and 3 yr olds I've ever met. With their exotic Swahili names, curious and playful as any two young lads could possibly get. Theirs is a knack for cars and all tech stuff; I reckon they'll make great engineers someday. It’s a beautiful day, beautiful people and amazing scenery.

I knew leaving our old home would be hard, but what I found on this other side was an adventure. Looking back, I wouldn't want it any other way.


Love Kristy.

Icy waters at the waterfall on a hot Jan afternoon.

       After the laughter & thrill of the day had died down, I lay in bed, having flashbacks on the day that was coming to an end. Right there, a feeling of realization began to sink in. Life is fragile. You have it now and the next second its gone. I remembered standing in the water, my feet barely touching the slippery rocks beneath, yet the water went way above my head. I was running short of air and with every desperate gasp, I took in a mouthful of dam water and a cluster of bubbles filled up above me.
       I wasn't afraid or shaken. Maybe I was too numb with fright or maybe I knew I would make it out alive. A sense of courage, calmness, persistence and resilience engulfed me. I made another dive and kept swimming towards the bank. I could hear Eric shouting at the top of his voice, scared as hell, urging me on and I felt myself force a smile. It was too bright a day to mess it up. Right arm up and into the water, then left arm up and into the water, paddling my feet continuously while at it. I was beginning to feel the rhythm when he grabbed me at the waist from behind and in a jiffy, my head was above the water. I gasped. It was Mel, composed as he always was. He swam effortlessly with dexterity as he carried me to the bank.
         We lingered at the edge of the rocks in silence. A combination of relief and disbelief. Taking time to regain composure, I sat there lazily feeling the sun's rays hit my skin. It felt warm and alive. When the silence finally broke, we laughed about it with  Eric and Tabz half-thankful that I was safe and half-scolding me. I knew it would be a long time coming before they let me forget. But am as sure as day I will certainly not need reminding.
      Mel sat an arm's length away still in deep thought. He was visibly shivering and said the water gave him chills. It was icy I agree. But more so, I believe he understood my experience on a deeper level. A feeling that am only beginning to understand tonight as I type this note in my bed. That life is precious. I'm still to get over all that was, but I did make a promise to myself tonight, that am not doing anything crazy in the woods anytime soon and am going back to my swimming classes asap. That's where I pen off n say goodnight.

Love always,
Kristy

Swaying emotions, this love thing

Love is just one of those emotions that reach deep down beneath the surface. It entrenches our happiness, our security, every sense of our well being. It takes two to tango ,they say. But be it a waltz or a slow romantic ballroom dance, we both have to feel the melody and be in step for a beautiful dance.

This young me:

The hardest thing with being a youngster

    Is trying to find your north pole

To find out what makes you tick.

Trying to strike an equilibrium between what you wanna

Convince your heart to be right ,

& what is actually differentially right.

To shape your path, to predict & know What for sure

You want as part of your destiny.

To shape your line of thought

To be in synchrony with your inspired dreams

& to create a state that enables their accomplishment.

Dreams do indeed come true,

What we desire does indeed almost always come to pass.

So look for that which you dream of & work towards it.

Learn to let first things come first &

Don’t start a job you don’t intend to accomplish.

Let what you start be well thought & strive for it

With all the passion you can muster!

Have a splendid day!

                       CN.